On the Stage

I am AFRAID of spiders. I dislike them very much...VERY much indeed. However, one must realize that I live in a household with a wife, who becomes violent if I don't immediately attack and kill the spider, LOL, and a little daughter who certainly doesn't like spiders, and reacts very scared to them because her mommy is so scared...

So that leaves the house with the man, I guess that's me, to kill the darn thing...which I do...everytime...unwillingly, lol.

I only mention this because it was Veronica's turn to give Kaia a bath and she goes in to start the water and lo and behold there is a big nasty spider in the corner of the tub. I don't know where he came from, and frankly, I don't want to know...at all! I just didn't want to deal with it, it makes me shiver and eehhh...it's just not good, spiders...yuck! BUT, Veronica comes out of the bathroom and tells me to go in there and take care of it.

Well, I don't confront spiders for sure. I will sneak up on them, but I will not get down there with them. The following occurs:

ME(L): "I don't know what to do!"
Veronica(V):"Well you have to kill it!"
V: "What are you doing?!"
L:"I'm getting hot water"
V:"That wont do anything! They just shrivel up in water, they don't die."
L:"Well, maybe I'll stun the guy and then I can get at him."
V:"Just get him! If he's gone when you get back I will not be able to relax because I won't know where he is!!" (oh, thanks a lot Veronica! LOL -- just what I need to think about)

So...armed with my cup of hot water (what? was I going to burn him very badly? LOL) and my green high top chuck taylor converse all-stars I go to the bathroom to seek out this spider. Luckily he is still in the same place...I lean over the tub THROW THE WATER ON THE SPIDER....he flinches...see, he's stunned just like I said he'd be! Then I lunge at him with my green high top chuck taylor converse all-stars and he's scrambling up the tub wall, but with the water he slips! AHA! Upper hand to Lars.

He's in the crease of the tub so my shoe doesn't get him...faced with no other option I dive into the tub, clothes and socks on and all, and bring down the shoe with avengance a second time. This time he's squiggling out the front of the shoe, green high top chuck taylor converse all-stars are naturally a little curled at the front of the shoe. In panic mode now (which I had been in for some time I'm afraid to say) I lunge one last time....

SUCCESS! Got the little bugger, still attached to my shoe I exit the bathroom, triumphant, and spray him off in the sink and down the garbage disposal...my heart returns to normal, and the daddy/husband comes through!