On the Stage

If you are at all weak of stomach turn back now for the tale I am about to weave is one of bad tastes and worse smells.

Don't say I didn't warn you!






So, last night I was home with Kaia (Veronica's show opens this weekend so it's tech week -- you theatre people will know what I mean by that) and I have been sick, we all know that. Most of it is gone, but I have a backed up nose and a cough to beat hell. Well, after supper (tuna noodle and chips) and a slight dessert (Peanut M&Ms) I have a tickle in my throat.

I start coughing, no big deal, but the tickle wont go away and I'm coughing hardcore now, it's heaving and it wont stop and my eyes are watering.

I bolt for the bathroom fearing a "tossing of the cookies" a "ralp" a "puke" a "throwing up" a "hurl" a "reverse parastaltic rush" coming on.

Now, I have never thrown up whilst coughing before...never! When it comes to throwing up, I made a pact with myself a long time ago that I would just not do it. I don't enjoy puking, I don't enjoy the feeling that it gives me, so I made the pact and I stick with it, only straying slighty from time to time.

Well last night was one of those times. It was a feeling unlike any other to puke because you are coughing too hard. It was right after supper too, so all it was was the food coming back up, it was not runny it was not full of water or anything (this happened to be the night I was too lazy to get up and get some water to drink with supper) and so it was odd.

I didn't get to puke in the toilet either, oh no, it was in the sink. I was still under the impression as I high-tailed it into the bathroom that there was NO way I could puke from coughing, so I was just standing over the sink because I thought I might need to spit out some phlegm or what have you.

Two heaves later and half of my supper and all of my dessert lay in a mass in my sink. "Well," thought I, "That is not going to wash down the drain." So I had to find a way to get it out of there. And smell it did, just like any other throw up.

Now mind you, Kaia is asking the whole time if I'm ok and if she can play with a certain toy, she had her heart set on this damn toy because she kept asking about it as I was coughing and heaving and coughing, lol. I let her know it was ok to play with that toy and that Daddy needed a minute.

The tickle is not gone, and I fear more heaving will be on the way, so I search for a way to get rid of the damned tickle. I drink some milk, something to coat my throat, nope. Ice cream is just BURIED in the freezer. No cough syrup to take. So I guess I'll wait it out.

In the meantime I need to take some paper towels and scrap out the mass of puke and insert it into the toilet. That worked fine and I wash out the sink, flush the toilet, and...luckily...the fiasco is over.

So that was my night in a nutshell...